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Is Mother’s Day without your mom even a real holiday anymore? I hate when people say the word “lost” when someone passes away. I didn’t “lose” my mom I know exactly where she is.
My Mom passed away 15 years ago in July. She was diagnosed with colon cancer when I was a freshman in high school. Her doctor only gave her six months to live but she surpassed those odds like she did everything in life, with strength and grace. If you had just seen my Mom out in public you would probably not even know that she was sick. She went through four years of surgeries, chemo treatments, radiation treatments, and so many medications and she never lost her hair. She lost weight but she never looked sickly skinny until the very end. I only hope that if something like that happens to me I can be as strong as her.
My Mom passed away the summer after I graduated from high school. I am so glad she got to see me walk across that stage at graduation. She got out of the hospital the day before and still got all dressed up, makeup and all, and attended my graduation in a wheelchair. She didn’t want that wheelchair and she didn’t want special treatment but I was so glad to see her in the front row so she could see me get my diploma.
I have graduated twice more since then but none of those graduations were as special to me.
I miss my Mom every single day and I still can’t believe I won’t ever see her again on this earth again. There are days that are harder than others but especially Mother’s Day. I love Facebook and all forms of social media but seeing everyone post pictures of them actually celebrating the day with their moms makes me want to shut down. The only pics I have to post are at least 15 years old and most are blurry or out of focus. I wish I had a good pic of me with my Mom but 15 years ago selfies didn’t really exist and photography isn’t what it is today. Neither did iPhones or social media and that seems so weird to me because I know my Mom would have been all over it.
My Mom was the “cool Mom”, always listening to the same music as my friends and I and wearing similar clothing. I remember one day she came to pick me up from school, I think my car was in the shop, and she had the sunroof open and was blaring Blackstreet’s No Diggity. It was epic!! And another time I was going on a first date and couldn’t find anything to wear and when I came home from school that Friday the shirt I had been eyeing at Stage was waiting on my bed for me. She loved a good surprise. I do to.
So I guess if this post has a point it would be to never take advantage of the time you have with your Mom. Take tons of selfies and pics with your Mom. Listen to her advice and then take it it because she’s probably right. You never know how long you have left with her and how much other people wish they could see or just talk to their Moms.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the motherless. You Mom matters too.
This is such an important thing to remember, and I’m so sorry you have to face the years without your mom. It’s heartbreaking. One of my very good friends lost her mom about 3 or so years ago. Her and I were only recent friends, but I went to the funeral with her and was touched by all of the kind things friends and family had to say about a woman who sounded so great. I watch my friend now, as she faces every day without her mom, and she still struggles deeply. She said it never gets easier, she just gets better at going on. *hugs*
Stacie @ Divine Lifestyle says
I’m so sorry for your loss. Even after 15 years, it’s still a wound to lose someone so close to you. I’m glad you had the time you did with such a wonderful mom.
My heart goes out to you. Father’s Day is hard for me for exactly the same reason. My father passed away from esophageal cancer in March 2015. The healing still hasn’t gotten much easier and I’m not sure it ever does. But knowing they are there with you in spirit and watching over us every day makes me happy and also thoughtful in my actions in making my dad proud.
Your mom sounds amazing. I can’t imagine Mother’s Day without a mom, but I’m sure her memory and all the great things she did makes it a little easier for you!
I’m so sorry about your Mom! I can’t imagine what life is like without one!! You have some very special memories! Hold on to those!
Vera Sweeney says
Your mom sounds like she was an amazing and strong woman! I can’t imagine Mother’s day with out my mom.
I love how you phrased it that we don’t “lose” them – that is a shame that we are not more intentional with our words, right? Your mom clearly had strength and fought to be there as long as possible. What a wonderful way to remember her and celebrate what she means to you.
Your mom was beautiful and I am sure, she was amazing. She made you a stronger person.
I’m sorry about your mom. Sounds like she was an amazing mother! Happy late Mother’s Day to you as well. You’ve got some really good memories too. I’m glad that you can always hold on to your memories.
Rebecca Swenor says
This is an amazing story indeed and brings tears to my eyes. My mom is sick now with end stage heart failure and has been visiting the hospital quite a bit the past few month. She has been strong and has fooled us and the doctors. You are so right when you say we don’t know how much time we all have here with our loved ones. Life is to short to waste and not enjoy every moment. Thanks so much for sharing your story.
I live about 600 miles away from my mom now. This was my first Mother’s Day being far away.
Up Run For Life says
My mom passed away 5 years ago. She had a long battle with a rare form of Alzhiemers. It attacked her frontal love which affected her short term memory and caused her to lose her speech. It was so hard to watch her. But she was happy and content for the most part especially if she had dr, mms, and sweets. :)
Ann Bacciaglia says
Mothers Day can be hard after your Mom passes. It is a great idea to do something you know your mom would have liked.
Marielle Altenor says
Sorry that you went through this. My mom is alive but I haven’t seen her since I was 6 years old. I hope one day I can celebrate Mother’s Day with her.
Crystal Lopez says
Such cherished memories for Mother’s Day. What wonderful way to celebrate her memory.
Travel Blogger says
I am so sorry for your mothers passing. It definitely makes those who have the luxury of celebrating with their mothers make note not to take it for granted.
Happy Mother’s Day! Thanks for sharing these beautiful pictures! I miss my mom so much
I’m sorry for your loss, but delighted to know that she surpassed the six months and lived much longer. My mom was just diagnosed with colon cancer and she will have a surgery soon. Hope she will surpass everything too just like your mom.
Maggie Branch says
Thank you for sharing this beautiful post. I am so sorry for your loss. Moms are so important and yours sounds like one of the best for sure.
Dorothy Johnson says
I’m sorry you and your mother were so young when she passed away. She would be proud of your tribute to her. I was blessed to have mine much longer, but I still miss her.