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***Disclaimer: I started this post last week in a hormone induced craze (aka on my period) but it really sums up how I feel right now.***
When did you have your life “figured out”?
I say “figured out” very loosely because I’m pretty sure we will never “figure out” life.
I’m at that place where I’m about to turn 30 but I still feel like I just graduated college and I’m footloose and fancy free.
Truth is I’m not.
I have real bills that include a mortgage.
I’m in bed by 930pm most nights.
I have a real job.
I have responsibility.
I feel like I do everything right…pay my bills, make time for fun, call my family on a regular basis, blah blah blah. But sometimes I wonder when am I going to really grow up?
I am terrible at saving money and I feel like at almost 30 I should be good at that. I should have a good amount in my savings account and the fact is I don’t. I make really good money but I’m also really good at spending it.
I always thought that by almost 30 I would be married and have kids. We all know that didn’t happen but that’s a totally different subject.
I feel like I should have this whole eating right and working out thing under control and take better care of myself but I don’t.
I feel like at this point in my life I should have everything figured out and I don’t and that’s FREAKING my little OCD heart out.
Anyone else ever feel like this??
Having it all Figured Out might be kind of boring?! Figuring it out is the adventure of life :)
Meredith Garrett says
Apparently Kelly Ripa is the only one who has it figured out – ha ha! I’m just kidding. But not really?
Anyway, thanks for sharing such an honest post. Maybe one day, I’ll get it all right, too!
Cori H. says
I feel like this quite often. You’re not alone!
I feel like this daily. I am almost 24 and STILL live at home. I haven’t graduated yet and my parents currently pay ALL my bills. Next year I’ll inherit a car insurance bill, phone bill, student loans, rent, utilities, gas, grocery bill etc. How I will pay for all that overwhelms me. I also don’t know if I will find a job next year or where I will be moving to. I feel like once I know more about getting my real job (when & where) then maybe I will be able to start “figuring it all out” but I seriosuly doubt it because all my money will go to bills and proabably not into savings either.
Also on the marriage/kids thing. I found the right guy but honestly there is no way we could ever get married anytime soon BECAUSE we would have to pay for the wedding on our own which will probably take years to save for on a teacher’s and personal trainer’s salary. I will most likely be almost 30 by the time this happens.
Scared to grow-up and feraking out about “figuring it out” as well.
Definitely not alone! I’m almost 26 and graduated college with my undergrad in May and still haven’t found a job. I’m feeling a little “lost” myself but I know I’m not only in a place I’m suppose to be, but I’m also heading to where I’m suppose to be.
I’m also horrible with money too. Not in debt, I’m just horrible at budgeting. It’s something I desperately need to work on.
Just What Jess is Up to says
I definitely can agree with you on this. I am 31 and I just can’t seem to figure out why I haven’t gotten it figured out. I too have responsibilities and a good job, but at the same time I am good at spending my money instead of saving it. I am on your side. I heard someone not too long ago say that the 40s are the new 20s…which means the 30s are like the teen years, maybe that is why we feel like it is not figured out!
Jill Flinton says
I am almost 40 and there are still parts of my life I haven’t figured out! I have a good job, but hubby can’t find work so we are having trouble getting the bills caught up too. I take it one day at a time.
As far as saving instead of spending, take a solid color jar of some sort and put a hole in the lid. Take the money you would spend on one coffee a week and put it in the jar instead of getting the coffee (or something similar). It adds up very quickly!
Oh sweet girl. We are so on the same brainwave (again!). I’ve been feeling a little “all over the place” “where am I going?” “What am I doing?!” a lot lately.
Sadly, I don’t have any words of wisdom, but, I did want to let you know 2 things- A) you’re NOT alone & I can completely relate & B) I think you’re fantastic!
I’m 25 (almost 25 1/2) and I feel like I should have more of a “grip” on life than I do. I don’t have money saved. I don’t know that my job is a career. I have no prospects of a boyfriend (let alone husband or kids!) anytime soon. I feel a little mixed up and lost these days.
I do LOVE having the support of amazing women like you & our blogging community!! We aren’t alone! This is normal and we are going to make it thorough!
You know you’ve always got a friend/someone to relate to in me!!
Girl, I know exactly what you mean. These real posts are always my favorite.
I feel like I may never have it all together, but you know, I think that makes you real. It’s honest and real which is important.
Also, you never know how fast your life could turn upside down. My life is going to be completely different and everything will have happened in 2 months.
Also, I have no prospects on the boy front (I haven’t even had a crush since college. Who am I?), so whenever you need to vent about that stuff (or anything), you’ve got my number!
Meagan P says
I’m not sure there is such a thing as Having it figured out. There’s always a new chapter and new situations to adjust to. When you get married you’ll have to figure that out, then kids, kids growing up/getting in trouble, kids moving out, you moving onThere’s always going to be something we have to figure out. Enjoy whatever chapter your life is in as it comes at you. Even if its sooner or later than you thought it would be. If you’re happy, healthy and not hurting other people in the process of doing those.. You’re about as figured out as it gets!
I love real posts like these BTW!
I still feel like that too girl, but a lot of people don’t admit it. you are so awesome to! what a great post!
A lot of these things are very hard to achieve. I have been nagging the husband about eating right all the time. I tell him, we can’t have Emma thinking it’s ok to eat a bag of cookies because daddy does! He claims that in the New Year he is going to start doing right. Hope he realizes veggies are in his future, I want her to know how to eat correctly.
I think we’ve all been misled with the idea that life will be perfectly “figured out” one day. Our society makes us feel like we always have to be striving for something more, rather than appreciating what we have.
I’ve gotten married and finished a college degree. Since those were my two main hopes, I don’t mind that certain other things – such as my job at a retail store – aren’t ideal.
It’s great that you have a mortgage…and many other bloggers and people have those “real bills” and responsibilities, too. They just might not show it.
Judging by this post, you are more grown-up than many other late-20’s/early-30’s people I’ve met.
Amen, amen! Almost 35 and feel the same way you do. This time of the year is the hardest for me too! It’s hard, but I’ve adopted the “stop trying to figure it out” attitude and just live. Nobody’s life is perfect – no matter how perfect they portray it! You will have good days and bad days, but the good always outweigh the bad as long as you are happy and confident in who you are. You are not defined by what society says we should have by certain ages, but by who you are! Keep your head up and ENJOY your life!
I’m turning 30 in a couple of months and i’m completely freaking out! I have almost nothing figured out yet… I’ve done many things like traveling, living abroad etc… But at the end (Aka when i’m PMS-ing) i feel like i have close to nothing :/
Janna Renee says
I feel like I have most everything “figured out”, but I STILL don’t feel grown up. I don’t know if I ever will…We haven’t decided if we are having kids, so if we don’t, I’m pretty sure we will be “kids” forever. Haha.